I had commented on Facebook about my hatred for public health...hatred may be a strong word, but right now it's the only word that I can think of that describes how I feel. I can not name one single time when I visited public health for our boys that I came out thinking "Wow, I'm doing a great job!" or "Wow, my kids are doing great!"...rather I always leave feeling like I am failing my children or that they are lagging compared to other children. But as I compare stories with other parents I realize that I'm not alone in how I feel.
I dread seeing public health! And not because of the boys getting needles...that's the easy part. It's the feeling of despair as I leave and think over all that I was told I was doing wrong. Today, I was told Levi wasn't getting enough tummy time (which they are always going to say), he should be wearing little mitts because he is going to have skin breakdown on his hands because he sucks on them, he's delayed because he isn't rolling over from his back to his belly and the list could go on if I want to complain more. But when she pulled out the nursing theory jargon and told me the reason he wants to be held all the time is because he's in the stage of "trust vs. mistrust"...come on...he just likes to be held! And imagine if I had admitted to her that I had started solids already...I lied and told her no. Especially when they ask the question denoting the way you should answer..."you haven't started solids have you?"
I know I'll get over this just like I have every other time...only 2 more times to go! So that's my rant...just needed to get my frustration out. I hope as a nurse I never come across as condescending and judgmental about the way my patients go about life...it really makes me consider how I treat my own patients. Hopefully they don't "hate" me as I leave their room.
4 comments:
Oh Viv, I relate completely! Every time I leave that little office, I feel like a slack, uncaring mother, who should know better because I am a peds nurse, after all.
If only they would spend more time telling mothers what they are doing right and sympathizing with the challenges of parenting...I think their attempts at health teaching would go a lot further! My personal pet-peave is the question about brushing your newborns gums. RIDICULOUS! I've gone so far as to ask my dentist the need for this and then argue with the nurse. Now I also lie about this practice to get them off my back. Haha...
Liesa
I cannot believe what you guys are going through. Can you not choose to have your doctor give injections to your baby? I never ever saw a health nurse when my kids were babies I always took them to my doctor for checkups, weight etc. Trust your instincts Vivian and have confidence in your abilities as a parent.
I know at Abigail's 18 month appt I told them she could probably say about 20 words and she asked me if I wanted a referal to speech therapy! I was like no I think she's doing just fine and we'll maybe start worrying about that when she's 3!
O Wow,... if you feel like that as an educated nurse, I wonder how the rest of the public must feel. I think you should just bring them to Rosthern,... I never get that kind of feedback here. I suppose my kids come with all different types of issues and they can't necessarily blame me. I actually feel respected,... and I think that's the way it should be. It's one thing to educate and another to belittle and make you feel like a pathetic parent when you obviously are doing a great job!
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